"I'm the Doctor. I work in a shop now - here to help..."
Mini review. Comedy episode. Low budget. Save the pennies for season finale. The Doctor's visiting Craig ( you know... tubby guy from The Lodger ) and his new baby Alfie aka Stormageddon, Dark Lord Of All. Craig feels like a useless dad. We all get that now and then...
Department store. Very obviously not just Debenham's with a new sign put up. Cybermen in the changing-rooms, the Doctor working the toy department. Robot dogs and silver rats. More scenes in department store. And more. Doctor and Craig searching for alien spaceship. And plot.
Craig discovers his paternal mojo and kills rubbish Cybermen with love. ( No, not with a cyber-STD... )
Closing Time is ( worryingly ) another weak episode in the season that's already given us That Pirate Story. The once-mighty Cybermen are wasted yet again, the plot is virtually non-existent, and there are only blink-and-you'll-miss-'em appearances from Karen Gillan, Arthur Darvill and Daisy Haggard. The relationship between the Doctor and Craig is still funny and charming, but isn't enough to sustain another 45 minutes. Luckily, Matt Smith is on top form: just look at the way he says "...what?" when "silver rats" are mentioned. Priceless.
And then, right at the end, in a chilling scene between River, Eyepatch Lady and the Silence, we remember that this Doctor's story will end very soon. Or will it?
2 1/2 out of 5 Bow Ties.
Oh, and Craig? On the subject of not knowing when to change a baby's nappy, I'll just say "sniff test" :-)